Memo from the staff

White House
March 25, 2012
To: The Boss
From: The Re-election Campaign
Subject: Update on Cloward-Piven Strategy

1. Create economic crisis and overwhelming public debt.
Done
2. Drive energy prices through the roof.
Done
3. Ignore growing foreign problems until they are a crisis.
Done
4. Put nation on a path towards socialized medicine.
Done
5. Create a phony "war on women" and blame the opposition.
Done
6. Create racial strife and conflict throughout America.
In progress
Our advisers say this strategy should result in a frightened, divided populace embracing the incumbent for a second term. It is modeled on the successful effort by the New Deal, which extended and worsened an economic recession while implementing policies closely resembling those of the Stalin and Mussolini regimes, both of which were studied and admired by Roosevelt's "brain trust."